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Wednesday, September 14, 2011


Since my childhood I have a vague belief in a few things. I and my brother had this notion that if we see three red cars in a row our wish comes true. I also believed in the beliefs like if the head hits once with anyone one must hit it again otherwise horns will grow on our head and if we see one mynah it means some sorrow, two means a wish, 3 means a letter, 4 means a toy and so on. Though I very soon realised that this stuff just keep the kids happy but somewhere I still followed them. Whenever I see mynhas I do say “two for a wish” and if I see one I do say “no sorrows please”. This happens mostly in my examinations when I see two birds together and rejoice thinking my exam is going to go well and in case I see one of them I say “I haven’t prepared well today, so it’s surely going to be bad”. Well, such are these stupid beliefs...though I know none of them is true (obviously) but still “dil toh baccha hai ji”.

Anyways, while I was moving out of my house I saw two mynahs together and had a long smile. I wished that the day goes well and something good happens. But as soon as I put on my spectacles, I got the situation a little clearer. It was actually one mynah and a crow. Alas!! One bird means a bad day and now I was going to have one. I regretted and came inside. Then suddenly a thought came into my mind. What if I had seen them only as two of them and not one as crow. I would have been happier and actually thought that the day is going to go well and think positive with every incident because I had formed an image in mind thinking no matter what everything will turn positive that day. I realised it’s my perception that matters about those things and the situation. Well, I am not saying that we must find positive and everything and ignore our mistakes or laugh at a miserable situation. I am saying NOT to find negative in a situation.

Just for an instance when one gets promoted in a job, one can become happy thinking his work has been acknowledged and he has progressed further in life or one can find sadness even in it saying “ohh, now there will be more work pressure. I can’t handle so much”. Similarly, when one studies one may think I will clear the exam if I work hard or just say “what is the point when I am not going to make it”. Even while marrying someone one can rejoice in the celebrations or say “ohh god, I will have to love with girl throughout my life” (though this is a little sad:) )… well, I am saying that one can find grief even in the happiest moment and can find happiness even in the pettiest situation. Even the miss universe has flaws :)… c’mon people, live the life, it’s your situation… we may live it or just complain about it...the decision is only ours.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

The lost dream or a new hope?

when I see the sky, I find no light
were the decisions wrong or was the moment not right
l am so confused that I laugh one time and other time I cry
and nobody understands that, as the tears have also gone dry
what was that I aimed for, what was the dream
I keep asking myself this question, I hopelessly scream
they say find a path, find a way
but the weight of failure once again scare me away
where are those wishes, where is that hope
I find like running away and search for a place to elope
but then I close my eyes and think over again
realises that this what losers say to gain
m not loser, I will decide my fate
I will be the master of my unconquerable soul whatever it may take
the sun will shine again after rain
there will be success all around which will take away the pain

ps: I m no good at poems…it’s my first one on the blog..just some random thoughts..apologies for any mistake

Monday, August 15, 2011


This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 23; the twenty-third edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton. The theme for this month is FREE.

As she was painting with a continuous smile on her face, she thought of the old times when her freedom was ruled by others and the suffocation she used to suffer. She thought of her father and the others who were always a misery in her life. They always said they love her, but at her heart she knew they wanted to incarcerate her in the barriers of life. But then she smirked thinking she accomplished her freedom and none of them could now ever impede in the success of her life.

She did not even have any last memory of her father and after all, why should any be there after what he did to her. He always interrupted in her dating men, going to clubs and said her paintings were meaningless. He never supported her. She remembered once she was talking to her friends in her room when his father came and said “no one is here in the room. Whom are you talking to?” She knew he lied and was finding reasons to mock at her. She knew he never understood her and wanted her to be deprived of all the joys in life. He used to say “I care for you princess and you are free to do anything”. Free? She never was, it was just for the sake of saying it and thus her father deserved to punished and killed. Her freedom had to be taken away from him when it was not given.

When she thought her ideas could be finally expressed and she could live on her own terms, her lover started to interfere. He always kept her asking “are you fine? Are you missing your father? Don’t worry. I am there with you” and then she started thinking of him as a stalker. He always wanted to know everything about her and never leave her alone. He said he did not approve of her “imaginary” friends and must consult a doctor. He kept following her many times and said he did so to make sure she was well.  He said “I am concerned and care for you. You are free to do anything”. But she knew it was never so. He just wanted to take away her freedom from her. Those were just some words as used by his father. She started hating him, he did not understand her choices in her life and so he had to be killed.

But those were not actually any loss in her life as she had got her freedom back and freedom was her right. She could now live the way she wished for and paint the walls of her house. There was no barrier to her thoughts and there was no stupid fellow watching her all the time. She had new friends everyday and they always did whatever she asked for. But looking at the four walls around her, she started to think she still did not like one man. He used to come every day to her house and say all her world was an imagination. He said “this was a psychiatric care centre you are living in. you have killed your father and your lover. We are here to help you and you will be treated soon if you help us”. She thought he was imprudent and did not understand her freedom. Then she looked at her painting all over the walls 

and thought “I will kill him soon and make him realise that I am free to do whatever I wish for. I will be finally free” and she smiled silently.

The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton. Happy Independence Day!

Saturday, June 11, 2011

It’s so hard to say GOODBYE!!

(Dedicated to all my NSIT friends)

Four’s a very long time, but all disappeared in a flash of second. It appears it was just yesterday that I was standing there nervously in a queue filling the admission form and hoping to be a part of one of the best engineering colleges of India, NSIT: my college, which eventually became my second home. From the very first day to the farewell night to my last exam, everything is deep down etched in my heart. It is still so fresh in my memory that I was filling my registration form on the first day of college that someone noticed the birth date on it and said “hey today is your birthday. What a coincidence”….Lucky day it was, not because it was my birthday but because I had my first step in the journey of four years of fun, laughter, joy, love, madness, learning and FRIENDSHIP. 

It’s not every day that on the second day of college…. even without knowing a person u say to him, “I will kick you one day” and then also he ends up being one of your good friends. Neither it is everyday that you are called by just three digits in the whole college and you keep sobbing about it. In a true sense, NSIT gave me a lot of friends. There were people who were my best friends, some were good friends, some were classmates and there were some faces that used to bring smile by their one look in the day.

If I remember every day of my four years I realise how I lived each one of it n celebrated like a festival. In the first year of my college, I was found to be the most extrovert person. I used to dress in a different (awkward) manner and was always trying to remain cool…Hehe……I was always so enthusiastic and had zeal for learning. There was a dream of achieving every high in life and wanted to touch the sky without wings…..those were the times of my childlike behaviour and all the classmates and my friends adjusted(or I should rather say tolerated) with it :)…… I tried to enter the classes from backdoors, was thrown out a number of times and there was all over confusion about the ED classes…..I made a robot (which nearly worked),  roamed in rains,  spent time at welding shops and with all these I made some lifelong friends.. :)

The second year of the college life gave me not only memories but also a project which was the, “The first ever Indian solar car”. I used to go to numerous places and all that independently. I found the pleasure in working with the seniors and did things which I would have never imagined like cutting my hand with hacksaw (hehe) etc. The project didn’t just add to my academic record but also taught me companionship, unity and teamwork. Another best part of my second year was that whenever the class used to go for a movie or an outing, it was a group of minimum 20 people (a big one)….  All the time it was a series of jokes or pulling someone’s leg (most of the times it was mine:( ).  I still think would it be possible in future to have that laughter again, to have those 20 smiling faces, to have those moments again………..

And then came the third year… when we considered ourselves as the seniors… we had a different attitude even in our style of walking (hehe)….we played cards, kept sitting idle for long hours just discussing stuff at Nescafe and played basketball, volleyball and everything. For a few reasons third years holds a special place in my heart. It’s because that I made many friends outside my department. And knowingly or unknowingly they became so special to me that whenever I close my eyes now, I see them as one of the first few people who would always be there for me and won’t let me shed even a single tear. And then the trip of Rishikesh happened…what days they were…. Chatting along with friends late till night, laughing down on floor with everyone and sharing the bad and good times. 

All this happened so hastily that I never thought how my life would be after my college…. I never imagined myself doing a job and I never imagined to part from my friends. The fourth and the final year came and passed. We hardly attended any classes, spent most of the time with friends. There were outings every other day and there were placements. The placements were not just a mere analysis of skills and talent but were a harder test of patience. I saw so many students breaking down and again getting up to fight back. But then with time, it also passed. And then was our last day, the farewell. I don’t even like this word, “FAREWELL”… gives me a feeling that all the joy, fun and my friends are going away from me…it gives me a feeling that those countless hands fighting on a plate of food won’t come back, those attempts to bring back one’s smile won’t happen again, and those stupid jokes won’t be heard again….

Yes, it’s true that every phase is set to pass but it pains…it really pains a lot even thinking about it…. but I have also decided one thing, no matter where I am and how busy I will be,  I won’t ever forget my friends, I won’t let go those people who held my hand when I needed them….. I will always relive those moments again. 

Friday, April 29, 2011

Silent love

(dedicated to my parents )

One day, as Madhav was coming home he heard a screeching noise of a car. As he rushed to see what happened, he saw a car was about to hit a blind lady when she was crossing the road. He asked her where she lived and if he could drop her. He told that he lived only a few streets away from hers and so if she allowed him to accompany her. As they were walking, they chatted throughout the way.

The lady was really polite and humble. Her voice was soft and gentle. She said she didn’t want to trouble others and so she doesn’t take anyone’s help. She asked him various questions about his education, hobbies, parents etc.  And then she told him that she could go by herself and they parted at a junction.

As coincidence had it, the two met again at the same road. They greeted each other and the lady asked why the boy was so upset today. In an irritating tone he said, “Parents are really annoying at times. They want to know each and everything. Why do they keep interfering in my life? They don’t know anything about today’s competition, success, glamour and fame. They want to go things in their own orthodox and conventional way. I really want to leave them and I know I would be really able to achieve everything all alone.”

The blind lady was listening but suddenly got a tear in her eye. The boy asked what happened to her.

She said
“Boy, do you know how did I lose my eyes? When my son was very little, he got into an accident, and lost his eyes. As a mother, I couldn't stand watching him having to grow up blindly... so I gave him my eyes and didn’t tell him about that... I was so proud of my son that he was seeing a whole new world for me, in my place, with those eyes. He always said I was an embarrassment for him and he could not take me anywhere as he felt ashamed. But, I was never upset at him for anything he did. The couple times that he was angry with me. I thought to myself, it's because he loves me. But then he left abroad for higher studies. He settled there and never returned back. When I called him once, he said he didn’t remember who I was and said never to bother him again………..”

“Boy, I don’t have a problem with that. I want him to have all the happiness of the world. But, I want to meet him just once. I want to see my successful son with his family.  I really miss the times when he was still young around me. I miss him so much. I love him. I love him. He means the world to me. And now my world has shattered!”

Saying so, the lady was all in tears and left. Madhav was still wondering how parents are so loving and selfless. He kept thinking about it and looked back. The lady had already somewhere disappeared.

[Courtesy: inspirationalstories blog for motivating me to write my idea by their story]

Monday, April 11, 2011

The memories of Navratri

Chait Navratras, the festival of nine nights was observed from 4th April to 12th April this year. They start on the first day of the Chaitra month of the Hindu calendar and ends on Sri Rama Navami, the ninth day of the month. The first day of this month is celebrated as Ugadi (The New Years for Hindus).

We started our Navratras by decorating our small temple. My mother did all the preparations, I was the important moral support she so needed ;-) 

People all over the country also fast for all the nine days. What I like about fasting is that the days I keep a fast, I always feel famished all the time. I keep eating fruits the whole day. But, my mother who is really devotional has never complained of hunger despite all the work she manages and neither have I ever seen her eating a lot. She has always believed in it from her heart and I have seen so many other people who do so too. 

In stark contrast, are some people who go on boasting about fasts and other sacrifices they make. I even heard a person once saying he would do it alternate days. What I think is God doesn’t ask of us to show off our devotion, and He doesn’t even ask us to say to leave work for him. He asks of us to have that belief and to remain good all the time with each and everyone. 

What I love about Navratras is the last day, when little girls come to our houses and they are worshipped. It is the Navmi. My mother says they are the 9 goddesses. Her face is always gleaming with joy to see them. Delicious delicacies are prepared and the girls are served. And I am always hovering near by and waiting for my chance :)…. This time very little girls of around 4-9 years came to our place. I sat with them and was enjoying listening to their discussions

And then memories of my childhood came to my mind. I still remember well how each one of us used to get ready in the morning to be treated as a Goddess in every house of the society. We used to eat from morning to afternoon and every family treated us with love and care. And while leaving, they used to ask us to bless them…. They believed that our blessings would bring them prosperity and success. And now when I saw these kids, it was the same. True it is that the times have changed but the rituals are the same. I was glad to see it. I later on ate with all those girls and then took their blessings.

With it ended my festivals of navratras, one which left many memories etched in my heart.

Friday, April 1, 2011

A war on girl child ??!!

It is a parody that a nation that aspires to be a world power has no social respect for its women. Various social, economic and demographic indicators provide evidence of a gender bias as well as discrimination against women and girl children. A country where a woman is identified as 'Shakti' ,where  Durga, Laxmi, Saraswati, Kali and many more such female deities are venerated as the highest form of God and sometimes even greater than Brahma , Vishnu and Mahesh actually has no place for a girl child. 

A century old Indian history shows that in the matter of sheer numbers, the female ratio in total population had always remained unfavourable. In this regard, the number of girls per 1,000 boys in the 0-6 age band, or the child sex ratio as it is called, has dipped to its lowest levels since Independence to 914. 

In 27 states and Union Territories, including Delhi, the child sex ratio has declined. The figure has dropped to 866 in Delhi and 899 in Uttar Pradesh. Haryana and Punjab remain at the bottom with child sex ratios of 830 and 846 respectively. In Rajasthan, the figure has sunk from 909 in 2001 to 883 in 2011, thanks mainly to growing no. of sex-determination clinics in the face of lax laws. Despite prolonged campaign by the People's Union for Civil Liberties against sex-determination tests, the authorities have not been able to take the guilty clinics and doctors to task.

In India, this brutal discrimination has become worse due the enduring dowry system: poor families go bankrupt trying to raise the cash or goods needed to get a daughter married. According to them “a boy is a better bet on the future”. Female foetuses are aborted by amniocentesis and ultrasound exams (although the practice is illegal) and if they are alive, they are kept malnourished and less likely to be taken to a doctor when sick.

This issue of the survival of the girl child is really a critical one, and needs systematic effort in mobilizing the community. Actually too many legislations and Acts are not needed, what is needed is to change social behaviours. We know that even the most educated, well paid women are unable to contribute to their parent’s well being. As a result parents consider them only as an economic burden. If some changes in such socio-economic and cultural fundamentals can be improvised then male preference can be reduced considerably. Similarly, there is a need to minimize the age gap between bride and grooms at the time of marriage. This would reduce the widowhood period among women and the motivation to produce sons will be lower.Several other measures can also be taken.

Now the time has come that the state needs to facilitate a change in fundamentals, directing programmes in the spirit that “the woman brings human life up so we all should bring her up”.  No other new laws are required. What is required is to actively enforce the older ones. 

If we wish to march shoulder to shoulder with the world's top economies and believe in giving equal rights to each one then we must address this problem very seriously and actively.

[source of data used: India Today]